Interests

I am interested in a number of mostly technical topics, I love to read about them and learn more about them, but I don't actively practice any of them! Partly because I am a brainlet, and partly because I can't afford the time or ment bandwidth to engage in each and every one of them. Sometimes I do try, though, mostly because I can't avoid the feeling of imposter syndrome I get from my vicarious enjoyment of these topics. But I also acknowledge the fact that so many devoted people have shaped the art that I couldn't pretend to stand on the same ground as them and instead admire their results.
Some of this topics are: geometry, number theory, mathematical astronomy, weiqi (aka baduk aka go), lisp programming, to name the most prominent of those.
Of course, I do profundize in other subjects, though those are less technical and require less of the problem solving that characterizes these topics. But even of those less technical subjects, there are those which I focus on and those that have to take second place and perhaps wait a few years until I have achieved some level of proficiency with my current focus.
Sometimes this is a problem because at times I just wander aimlessly, feeling outstretched between the myriad books and subjects I am buffetted with at any time, feeling guilty for neglecting one or another, and oftentimes I discover more and more new topics and stacks of books for each topic, and even worse, any one topic may suggest connections to many more, and indeed, everything is connected so I have a loose network of topics which I know but superficially and they all inform each other but the depth of my knowledge keeps me from reaching meaningful insights or at any rate from being able to confidently assert that some situation does indeed weigh on this other one as it seems to do from my perspective.
Truly, knowledge is ignorance and the only ones who I see arguing confidently are those who seem to stay oblivious and it is they who do move and turn the wheels of history. The more I learn the less I know.

>Sometimes this is a problem because at times I just wander aimlessly, feeling outstretched between the myriad books and subjects I am buffetted with at any time, feeling guilty for neglecting one or another

>but the depth of my knowledge keeps me from reaching meaningful insights or at any rate from being able to confidently assert that some situation does indeed weigh on this other one as it seems to do from my perspective.